Chitchat and the occasional in-depth analysis about fiber, knitting, spinning, crochet, cooking, feminism, self-image, and a modicum of personal blathering.

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Monday, August 17, 2009

Brown paper packages tied up with string

Back to craft and other fun stuff after a minute here.

I got an anonymous comment on my last post. I want to address some points this person raised.

"As a woman who is a SAHM by choice I was not offended at all by the ads. My husband and I have been married for 30 yrs and have learned that the secret to a great marriage is laughter."

First of all, let me commend you for being a stay-at-home mom. It's hard work that is generally thankless and unpaid. I applaud women who are willing and able to do this work. Now. The point of my whole post was not the airing of a personal offense to the content, it was a concern with an organization that seems to confuse humor with untrue, harmful stereotypes that hurt both men and women. Yes, I agree completely that a great marriage needs laughter to succeed, but ideally, your spouse should not be the butt of your jokes.

"Just because a woman does not work outside the home and does not generate an income does not mean she lives with a man who keeps her locked up. Care to share your secret for a happy marriage and successful parenting? Do you really think if a man makes a joke about his wife and her shopping that they can not have a successful, equitable relationship?"

I think that a marriage where a man treats his wife like a child who cannot be trusted around shiny objects is destined for marriage hell and eventual failure, yes. As to my "secret" for a happy marriage, I'm not the one getting the 1.5 million plus a year for this schlock, but I'd say it starts with mutual respect and trust and sharing of resources. And actual humor. Not making your wife the butt of your rib-elbowing jokes with your homies.

"Do you also assume that if a man hints that most of his income is spent on his children that he wishes he would have had a vasectomy? Have you never seen the t-shirts saying.. " My child and my money go to ----- university? What parent has not made a comment like that?"

My issue was not a one-off comment or the occasional joke, it was the place of this attitude in the whole series of ads that push stereotypes and unhappiness (as well as penury) as a natural result of marriage and childbearing. It's all about the context, dude.

"I was pleased to read that the ads were written by women .. women who in my view have a sense of humor."

If those ads were indeed written by women, I'll eat my hat. And in my view, they're about as funny as a minstrel show.

At any rate, onward and upward.

We went to the National Aviary, located here in Pittsburgh, on Sunday. It was really cool-I haven't been there since the kids were little. Here's a slideshow. (click through for individual photos or to embiggen)



In crafting news, gads, I haven't posted any crafting stuff in a couple of weeks. I'm knitting on a basic top-down raglan tee for myself, in the round, kinda making it up as I go along. It's got a garter stitch collar and placket like the little baby sweater I made a little while ago but the scale is so much bigger there's really not much comparison otherwise. Hopefully this is something I can actually finish.

I did finish Cosy's Baby Belle sweater. IT IS SO ADORABLE. It almost makes me want a grandchild. ALMOST. No, not really. But it is cute. It makes me wish for a baby girl I can give it to.

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I love those little buttons-my mom and I went through her button box and found the perfect match. Both yarns are handspun. The pattern calls for a third yarn for the button bands but I thought that might have been too much considering the variegation in both the main yarn and the trim.

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So cute. I love the ruffle.

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Last weekend I could not figure out what I wanted to knit. It turned out what I wanted was to spin, so I spun this orange sport-sock. It's thicker than I wanted, but the yardage is good-about 350 yards.

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I'm really going through an orange/yellow phase lately.

Also got the first fan lace sock done and started on the second.
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The yarn really is terrific, the stitch definition in that riot of colors is way better than I expected. They look like a bowl of fruity pebbles.

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Well, I'm cooking a rather elaborate Monday dinner and the rutabaga is calling so I must be off. I'll try to post later in the week if I can.

2 comments:

Blossom Vydrina said...

It makes me wish for a baby girl I can give it to.

sssshhhhhhhhhEloriasssssshhhhhh

Jamie Longstreth Fritz said...

That's a good thought Blossom, but I'm not sure she'd handwash.